Therapy at luxury rehab was much different than I expected it to be. For some reason, I expected it to be really formal and stuffy. I thought there would be a lot of people in the room, and I’d be embarrassed. Instead, it was really welcoming. The people were there to genuinely help, and not judge me in any way. I really expected it to be more difficult to open up in front of new people, but it wasn’t anything like I expected.
When I first started my recovery journey, I would second-guess myself at rehab constantly. I couldn’t think of anything in a positive light. No matter how much positive momentum I would get going, the constant doubts would kill it. I would think I could go a day without using, but then think using would be inevitable. I had no willpower or self-restraint anymore. It was really difficult to get past this phase. Honestly, I’m not sure I am completely past it now, but it’s far better than it was.
For the better part of my existence, I have been second-guessing my life. Each choice I made, and why I made it, were constantly scrutinized by me. I never felt good enough to be around anyone. My parents were barely around, and I thought it was because they didn’t want to be. I had so many issues with my self-esteem that I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror. That’s where my initial draw to drugs came from. Even for an hour or two, I could escape that reality.
Getting addiction help isn’t easy as it is, but when no one believe you’re an addict, it is even harder. I spent nearly a year seeking help. No one would listen to me. They thought because I was ‘only’ using marijuana that I wasn’t really an addict. I couldn’t stop using it, or my anxiety would skyrocket. People have this assumption that marijuana isn’t addictive. I did, which is why I wasn’t afraid to try it at first. Now I know better.
I have been struggling with depression off and on during my life. It’s plagued me since I was young, and still visits regularly. Prior to my addiction, I got badly hurt. Nearly no one around me seemed to care, and fewer offered to help when I couldn’t function. The doctor was kind to me, but he was the only one. Everyone else who had called themselves friends before then, just disappeared. I felt as though I was seeing their true colors, and spiraled downwards faster than I could catch myself.
Positive habits take a lot of time to create. Bad habits are much easier. However, they won’t help you live the sober life. If you want to be able to get past addiction, once and for all, you need to create positive habits. If you go home with your old habits intact, you are doomed to relapse. Take the time at rehab to work on creating those positive changes. You have help and can get an outsider’s perspective on how beneficial each habit can really be.
While in rehab, there are many therapeutic activities that you may partake in. Each rehab is different, and offers different activities. You will need to ask the rehabs you consider which activities they offer, so you can pick which ones sound beneficial to you. Some will help you more than others. You can then decide which activities to do on your own, and which will include a group. Participation is the best way to get yourself moving forward through the recovery process. Making sure that you actively work with the activities at rehab, gives you the best leg up when you go home.
Equine therapy during luxury rehab is a great way of feeling better. The horses love the attention, and love giving you attention in return. There have been many studies about how much animal therapy can help people. While recovering from an addiction, you need some consistent positives. This lets you feel good about going through a harsh process. By turning to equine therapy during luxury rehab, you get these positives, among other things.
I found an entirely new way to look at life once I opened up at rehab. My life began to open before me, and I finally saw opportunities. I am grateful for what I see out of life now. Before, I saw my struggles. I saw how stuck I was where I was at. It took me seeing things in a new light for me to really see what life had to offer. I am so grateful for this new perspective. It makes my life so much richer and fuller than I ever thought possible.
I learned the most during the quiet at rehab. That’s when I took what we talked about in therapy, and processed it. It wasn’t that I didn’t learn a lot in therapy, I just learned more when I went back over what happened in my head. The reflection helped me come to grips with what was really going on. When rehab would wind down and get quiet, my time officially began. I still think back on the quiet at rehab as one of my fondest memories.